Ok, so I was saying in my last post that I haven't been inspired lately to write about birth. Well, I found myself inspired this morning after I read this
article at TIME.com entitled "Choosy Mothers Choose Cesareans." (Those who know me: Can you hear my silent scream as I read this?)
It highlights one mother's choice to choose a cesarean for her birth based on two things: her mother's story of a long labor followed by a cesarean and her own experience observing vaginal deliveries in her medical school rotation.
This is a perfect example of what I think are the most common reasons women in today's society are scared of natural childbirth: Sometimes
Scared to Death, literally, because cesarean mothers are
3-5 times as likely to die from the major cesarean surgery and it's complications.
The issues brought out here by this article are these:
1- A negative birth culture perpetuated by misinformation
2- The misconception that what goes on at the hospital is "Normal" childbirth.
Let's start with no. 1.The culture in America around women's issues, not just childbirth, is profoundly negative. It starts at menarche goes full force into childbirth and doesn't end before covering menopause with its dark, negative cloak.
Young girls are taught subtly or even outright that having their period is a shameful event that should be concealed and suffered through. I have the pleasure of currently raising a young daughter who is quickly approaching menarche. I've
strived to instill in her a natural love for her blooming womanhood. But, I have to say it is an uphill battle. Evan in elementary school, her teacher told the classroom full of impressionable girls that she "hated"
that time of the month and can only get through it with chocolate.
The young girls grow up ashamed of their natural womanly processes and this negativity continues to build. When they become pregnant women who should be encouraging her and strengthening their sister try to scare her and make her doubt her innate wisdom and ability to birth the child that grows within.
Fearful women tell expectant women horror stories, sometimes in an attempt to justify their own choices and the consequences of them. For example, I've heard this Myth more than once, "My water broke and I had to have a "DRY" birth. It was terrible." FACT: There is no such thing as a DRY birth! Your amniotic fluid constantly replenishes itself. While I do not doubt that the memories she has are terrible, she is misinformed and spreading her misinformation and negativity like poison ivy. Baby Showers become showers of nightmares - who endured the worst labor? Who wins the metal? Ha! It should be a time of hope and inspiration.
Previously, a woman would be surrounded by her mother, sisters, aunts and grandmother who would pamper her and prepare her to walk through the journey of childbirth and come out a strong mother. Because of the history of childbirth in our country the mothers and grandmothers of
todays pregnant women do not have that strong courage to pass on because their own births were isolated, drugged events that left them without empowerment and alone.
It's no wonder then that these same women who are taught to fear childbirth also do not believe their cursed, broken bodies can provide nourishment for their babies. Breastfeeding, along with childbirth has been riddled with negativity, shame and doubt. Again, our mothers were taught that scientific formula was better for their babies than primitive, unscientific
breastmilk. They believed it - science DISPROVED it, but the culture of fear and misinformation remains.
Now, no. 2: The idea of a "normal" birth happening in a hospital - especially a large teaching hospital with medical residents perfecting their skills - is laughable. What this poor, scared woman saw in her medical training is a FAR, FAR cry from normal. One travels off of the path of normal once they take that first intervention. From there it is a domino effect.
It is certainly true that doctors truly believe that they are doing what is best, most of the time. I say most of the time because I have personally heard doctors while they made the decision to do a C-section verbalize the fear of a law suit as their motivating factor. But, most of the time doctors are just as scared as the laboring women. They have seen births go bad - birth riddled with interventions, I must say - but nonetheless births have gone bad.
My own sister-in-law is an OB/
GYN and recently got married and pregnant for the first time. Well, at the bridal shower - BEFORE she was even pregnant - she told us that she has her c-section already planned out. "Why," I asked. Because she doesn't think that having a baby vaginally is a "good" way to have a baby. This is just sad.
The science has said it. The
risks of cesareans are great to both mother and baby. But, people are too afraid.
The only way to change the tide in America is to start young. Infuse your young daughters with truth and power and the ability to embrace their womanhood,
conquer difficult circumstances and come out empowered and ready to be a powerful parent to their children.
The article, "Choosy Mothers Choose Cesareans" ends by saying as birth EVOLVES, a woman will be able to choose a c-section over a vaginal birth with as much ease as she can choose bottle-feeding over breastfeeding.
May God help us and not let that be the case.
She told me today that after her last birth (2months ago) she felt like something was missing... Yes, a baby came out of her body (this cutie pie shown here, to be exact)....but wasn't there something more that was supposed to happen? She went on to say that if she ever had another baby she would actually consider an unmedicated childbirth experience in an attempt to experience that "something more" with her birth.
